Sunday, 2/23-- self-help youtuber suggests two intriguing interventions to avoid doomscrolling. 1. write down on paper every time you're inclined to check your phone for something and the circumstances. 2. dumb down your phone with grayscale, do not disturb, and delete your social apps.
It turns out android phones won't let you delete youtube, but you can disable it. I'm not quite ready to switch to analog note taking or a cold turkey no-media diet. I listen to some audiobook on libby. I watch a bit of a Rajiv candle-making tutorial at my desk and some Netflix standup comedy while doing my stationary biking exercise. Mostly, this seems to have freed up time to do a bit more recreational reading. It seems like the main trigger for reaching for my phone are to compulsively check my never-ending to do list. So I printed that google note out for easier reference tomorrow...
Mon, 2/24-- the printed list concept seemed to help today. This was a 100% homeschool day, so outside of logging the kid in to two zoom meetings (pretzel cooking and lego build challenges), I didn't do much with my phone except report roadkill on our dog walk. Still very much missing Youtube, but I think the fun factor of school was pretty high in part from my being more present (and in part from spending media time re-reading Julie Bogart's Brave Learner). Tomorrow kid is at the learning center and I plan to spend some media time doing a biking workout. My challenge is to try to record a body doubling audio blog.
Weds, 2/26 -- I re-enabled Youtube, wanting to hear more of a Huberman immunity interview I started yesterday on the bike. It'll be educational, I thought, since daughter also expressed interest in, "getting my body to level 100," in a car conversation about a lingering runny nose. I thought this would also allow me to better watch daughter in open gymnastics from the observation deck (I usually sit in the back with a book). I could see her, but couldn't clearly detect if the "Help! mom!" screams were coming from her or someone else when she got herself into a forward roll that was a standard maneuver on the bar, but had been attempted on a balance beam. Coach John got to her before me. She made such a fuss in the debrief, a friend got her an ice pack and she still insisted she needed to bum shuffle all the way to her water bottle cubby and leave 30 mins early. High octane kid. She learns at light speed but things go (and stay) off the rails just as quick. We listened to some of the Huberman interview on the drive home with me wondering if it would have been Better Parenting to be (1) totally lost in a book out of line of sight or totally (2) helicoptering on the gymnastics floor while listening to the podcast (or (3) helicoptering while listening to nothing at all). I found myself at home wanting to finish the interview on headphones in the afternoon rather than giving her my undivided attention in part because her drama depletes me and withdrawal is my most effective self-care. Plus I wanted to hear the full 3+ hour interview before completing an online order for a vitamin B supplement our spring break tour company suggested, they might suggest other supplements! (turns out I have and was already taking the two they discussed). And the last 30 mins I was so riveted to the conversation I ended up taking a power nap. All in all, I would say the YT re-enable did not dramatically improve quality of life today. I disabled it again during her piano lesson and will try another detox, even though my brain is still prodding me with ideas like "We could look up all those gymnastics moves daughter's coach put on her grading rubric on Youtube as a fun educational activity with the kiddo..."
2/27 I reinstall for 8 mins to watch a video over a car lunch break then immediately uninstall. Kinda worth it. I reinstall to go for a 60 min run but my bluetooth headphones are on the fritz. Run in silence/moving meditation, not ideal, but not bad.
2/28-3/2 I listen-watch a couple more videos while biking in the trainer (how to make pioneer dipped candles and El Salvador's "cero ocio" prison reform policy. Before getting to those planned "watch later" videos the shorter suggested feeds briefly derail me but I haven't quite slipped into full-blown bored browsing for content. I'm largely helped first by the binge read dead of Yarros' Fourth Wing book and then by the Animal, Vegetable, Miracle audiobook coming available from my library which lent itself well to puttering around the house doing chores.
No comments:
Post a Comment